• girl: babe come over
  • boy: I can't I'm having a threesome with an older couple
  • girl: my parents aren't home
  • boy: I know

theberlinpaywall:

i have found the most important facebook page

sincerely-steeny:

galifianafuck:

when you write a sentence and it rhymes

image

why does the picture make perfect sense

preys:

Eventually we’re just gonna have to accept “ducking” as a swear word

theonqreyjoy:

oceanflowerbird:

The best kinds of laughter:

  • Laughing so hard that your laugh becomes silent and you sit there clapping like a fucking seal
  • Feeling a six-pack coming up
  • Tears coming out of your eyes

#you know you’re fucked when its a combination of all three

rickydillon:

#petitionforellentobeinfrozen2

EIPHROEKFSDDTG

do